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Do women like it when guys smile?

If you’ve read this study, you might be thinking that women like guys who have that tormented, serious look.

But if you’ve read the Magic Bullets Handbook or Daytime Dating: Never Sleep Alone, you know that you should smile when you first approach a woman.


Not really. If you look at the Science Daily study carefully, you’ll see that it is based on women looks at dating profile on an online dating site. Whereas Love Systems is based on what happens in the real world.

On an online dating site, a woman is protected by the screen and the distance. It’s not all that different from movies. A lot of women might think that, say, Christian Bale in American Psycho is hot. But I don’t think many of these women would actually want to go on a date with his character. So, it’s not a terrible idea for an online dating site, but it IS a terrible idea for the dark corner of a nightclub or a stranger walking down the street.

As a guy, when you approach a woman you are probably bigger than her and stronger than her. This can make her nervous and defensive (especially if you approach her on the street). So before she has to guess whether you are planning to try to pick her up or whether you are planning to mug her, give her a smile to show some friendly intent. Don’t leave it plastered on, but smile at first to put her at ease.

On a side note, I’ve seen a bunch of studies like this recently. I think researchers are so thrilled to have data in large quantities (from internet dating) that they are ignoring the fact that internet dating is not the same thing as meeting people in person and a lot of what they think they are learning does not actually translate to anything outside of internet dating.

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